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Saturday, August 18, 2018

Interview With A Time Traveler

[Please excuse accidental publishing of this post earlier this afternoon with only a couple sentences completed. I'm still in recuperation mode and doped to the gills. Wheee! Sorry, that just slipped out.]
 
I found the time traveler at my own kitchen table. He didn't look well.  I asked, "What's wrong?"


TT: I've been ill lately, recuperating on a diet of vegetables, mainly.
Geo.: So I see. What sort of illness?
TT: Oh, the kind timetravelers get when they stop any where or any when and try to settle down.
Geo.: How long have you been traveling?
TT: 68 years, all forward. 
Geo.: No Backward?
TT: Oooh I wish. You need superluminal speed to send anything back in time and I'm just not up to it.
Geo.: What about positrons?
TT: Antiparticles of electrons?
Geo: Or electrons going back in time. I've never heard a firm answer. Both descriptions work in physical calculations.
TT: Explain.
Geo.: We send electrons as modulated electromagnetic waves into the future all the time --radio, tv etc. Why not generate positrons, modulate their wavelength and send them into the past?
TT: Because, in the grace and cruelty of time, there are some things we're not meant to do.
Geo: That's absurd, we could repair so much past damage!
TT: Typical thought of a backwoods hick! What was your zip code in your home town, Geo.?
Geo.: Uh, e-i-e-i-o.
TT: And what is your current occupation?
Geo.: Teaching applied hornet-dodging at our south door.
TT: And what are your most ancient ancestors?
Geo.: Fossil remains on primordial plains.
TT: And if you could send a message to them --perhaps to improve their hygiene. What would that be?
Geo.: Uh, lavatories?
TT: These are people who have only mineral content now. If you were similarly fossilized, what would you expel in a lavatory?
Geo.: Lava!
TT: Excuse me, I must be vegetating on now. 



25 comments:

  1. Hoping you have a speedy recovery. I did notice that your time traveller was looking a little green around the gills.....except that he [?] wouldn't have gills, would he?

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    1. True, Tom. He seems to have a fine pait of cucumbers though.

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  2. I wonder what it'll be like to not need time anymore.

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    1. I suspect we'll always need it, Mike. Time is a function of motion and space that multiplies possibility. Without it, not only would nothing happen, it would happen at once.

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  3. A delightful bit of musing. And that time traveler reminds me of someone I knew about 1968. Perhaps the positrons were on a mellow wavelength and we surfed a few moments in time together. Or perhaps it my mind that seems awestruck about how quickly it is traveling through time, playing tricks.

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    1. Reminds me of someone in 1968 too, Tom. Same guy, maybe? I used to brush his teeth.

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  4. Norma's Time Traveller has some heavy-duty sideburns there! Your technical knowledge always bowls me over, Geo. I used to pick myself up, get straightened out and have another go - only to get bowled over again. Now I just keep rolling and wave as I go by. Because I know I will NEVER understand some things.

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    1. You understand a great deal, Jenny. The mind seeks ever-expanding layers of organization --the real frontier.

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  5. You must take your "happy" medicine again. TT seems like an amazing conversationalist.

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    1. Thanks, Emma. The conversation reminds me of many that my brother, Frankie, and I had when we were kids. He was possessed early on with a fascination for relativity and quantum physics. He'd draw diagrams --the secrets of the universe with a stick in the dirt.

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  6. I have had days when I have woken up looking very similar to Norma’s Time Treveler. I looked up “positron” and still don’t know what it means. I am afraid that my mind is really full of flat leaf parsley now (or is it cilantro?)

    There is a lot to be said about moving forward, Geo. I am all for it, even though there may be things ahead that I would rather skip over.

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    1. Dear Arleen. You have a keen eye --it IS cilantro. As for the positron, it's considered the antielectron --antiparticle (antimatter counterpart) of the electron. The positron has an electric charge of positive one (electron is negative one), and has the same mass as an electron. PET (positive emission tomography) was used to scan my body for abnormal cells. Good thing too!

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  7. Wow! A science lesson with a pun included. I'm impressed, Geo.

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    1. Dear Bruce, when science has us by the short hairs it is prudent to pun away.

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  8. Anyone who can write this well when they're "doped to the gills" has my wholehearted admiration.

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    1. Dear Jon, it's a skill I saw developed by others in English 1-A back in '68, so I know it can be done. It is an unreliable preparation for essays, though, so I tend to avoid it now --except where the dope is masking geriatric pain instead of youthful angst.

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  9. I'm deeply sorry for your long, scary, dark summer, Geo. You deserve a break! So I'm relieved to know the docs got it all. Get all the rest you need. Be gentle with yourself. We love you and will be ready for your return whenever you're ready.
    Love and healing energy.

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    1. I love you too, Robyn. Just remember, I worked on an asbestos removal gang and I smoked for 50 years --you won't catch me doing THAT again. I'm back up to the point where I can drive again and Norma has been taking photos I must attend to. I don't like hospitals and have resolved to be good. All my best to you --"love and healing energy" most welcome.

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  10. A homegrown face is a reassuring sight. This time of year we are largely made of cucumber too, and in need of applied hornet dodging. Good to hear from you and looking forward to your full recuperation :-) xx

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    1. Thanks, Lisa, for the encouraging words. I needed to hear from a kindred hornet-dodging cucumber spirit.

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  11. Your mind is sharper on pain meds than some people's minds are when they're stone cold sober. Maybe a quick trip back in time is in order to keep you away from the asbestos-cleaning gang... and to make you cough so hard when you light that first cigarette, you never pick up another one. My hubby did some fiberglass-sanding at a boat-building place before he went to college, and in Nam, Uncle Sam sprayed him from the sky multiple times with Agent Orange. Smoking? For him, it's been almost sixty years now, and he still hasn't given it up. (sigh) I just read last night that second-hand smoke is more dangerous than first-hand. Crap, maybe I should take up smoking again... (Just kidding. I'm too cheap to pay those kinda prices!)

    Keep on getting well, dear Geo.

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    1. I intend to survive this and follow your instructions. My corner Arab is sad that I buy so little pipe tobacco any more but has adjusted his ordering to accommodate me. I also buy wine and gasoline there, so he doesn't feel abandoned --nice, sensitive guy.

      Sometimes, in doing kindness for others, serving, raising families, we forget to be kind to ourselves. Recovery is a big adjustment. I wish you all well.

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  12. Time travellor looks a bit like Bob Dylan...take me back.

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    1. Soon as we can get the trainride schedules worked out, Delores. 'Til then, we all go forward. Works pretty good, I guess.

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