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Wednesday, August 28, 2019

The Fantasist's Curriculum

For me, it began with a book, a book from my father's library. This book:

The Parnassus (221, 4th Ave. NY) edition is undated but I first unshelved it in 1957 and, as an old man but young bibliophile, can estimate its age as at least 100 years. The first English translation of Munchausen, translated from Rudolf Raspe's original German, was published in 1785. The American edition relies heavily on it.

The real Baron Munchausen, Hieronymous Friedrich, Freiherr von Munchhausen,  from Bodenwerder, Electorate of Brunswick-Luneburg, was a soldier for the Russian Empire during the Russo-Turkish war in the late 1730's. He was known for recounting adventures (and embellishing them) but balked at anyone exaggerating his exploits in print because he believed they could not be further exaggerated. Hence the following disclaimer:
This, of course, caused publishers to invite three reliable signatories to legitimize the contents --visible over my thumbnail.  Of course, we students of fantasy never exaggerate, never deviate from the facts as we imagine them, but what really impelled me toward this strict discipline was Karel Zeman's film, which I saw in the 1960s. None who watch the Baron's hat spin off into outer space can keep part of their minds from following in the closing clip.


I don't want to give the false impression that these teachable yarns composed my whole education. I also went to school and passed hard courses in civics, history, math, language and science --with the exception of Zoology --too many o's, and I never understood The Periodic Table of The Elephants.

Thursday, August 15, 2019

A U-Solve-It Enigma

I've never posted a U-Solve-it mystery before but find it presently unavoidable. It was perpetrated yesterday by wife, Norma, and photogenic accomplice, Darwin Doorbooger. It consists of 3 photos taken with her cell phone which --1st clue-- has no setting for selective focusing. And yet...
...there is Darwin in crystal clarity with soft-focus geraniums beyond.

I spent well over 30 years in high school (as student and gardener, what did you think? Oh how could you?) and am very well educated, yet I could only guess she'd coaxed Darwin indoors and onto a window overlooking...no, we have no geraniums blooming window height (second clue). 

Another photo:
These are not products of trick-photography --notice my fingers never leave my hands. Here is the closing photo and a final clue from the master of deductive reasoning, Sherlock Holmes:

"When you have eliminated the impossible, whatever remains, however improbable, must be the truth"--Arthur Conan Doyle. 
Hope you have as much fun with this puzzle as I did. Theories, comments, questions and opinions welcome!

Friday, August 9, 2019

Conundrum Of The Concrete Cat

There is, nearly invisible in our south stumpery, an abiding enigma --the Concrete Cat:
Concrete Cat came from Norma's parents' property, which she and her younger brother have been clearing and tidying. They found it under some ground-cover vegetation but don't remember having seen it before. Norma brought it here. I tried to help determine its origin but could only quote Shakespeare:
   "Lady, you bereft me of all words, only my
     blood speaks to you in my veins, and there
     is confusion in my powers." (Merchant of
     Venice; act 3, scene2).

Still, I cast my mind back over a half century, back when her family accepted me as suitor for their daughter and made me welcome. I  was often invited for meals (I shared an apartment with 3 hungry men and could not rely on our larder). I would have a beer with her father over a game of chess, and later climb the backyard tree with Norma and...nevermind, then play ping pong on an outdoor table with everybody. 

I am familiar with her dad's sculptural caricatures --animals with bulbous bodies, pebbles and marbles for eyes and collars-- and strongly suspect this is his work alone. He taught his kids how to make decorative stepping stones by this method, but those were larger, more substantial. Norma's had pebble peace symbols in them. I am proud to have both in my garden.

Sunday, August 4, 2019

Rude Questions

I have always wondered at the about the enigma of rude questions. They are valued by tabloids but eschewed in the polite society that buys them. I decline to name the source of these inquiries but here's an example: What do you look like without makeup?  Like this:

What, is it noticeable?
Another rude question: Have you ever argued with an HOA, Draft Board or other authoritative committee? Yes, here's how it went (with help from two of the finest actors on Earth, Alfonso Bedoya and Humphrey Bogart): 
Bedoya&Bogart

Third question: How far do you feel, ideologically, from the President of the United States?

I decline to comment on the current misadministration, but will compliment the January 21st, 2nd Inaugural Address of Ronald Reagan --my political antipode except where he saw reason and allowed it to obtain. I met him personally 3 times while he was governor here, and he was just a real nice guy. On that day in 1985, he was building a future. I was building our barn.
 I'd say we were pretty much on the same page.